Tag Archives: Bob Burg

Attitude, Belief Systems, Bob Burg, Choices, Value

The Fragility of Receptivity

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Todays guest post is by my friend and mentor, Bob Burg.
He talks about the vulnerable place from which receptivity comes. Those who know me well, know that I stand on the fact that vulnerability is strength. And in this case, vulnerability is financual success. If you have The Go-Giver book, today is the release date of the Expaned Edition.

The Fragility of Receptivity
by Bob Burg

In John David Mann’s and my book, The Go-Giver we discuss the fifth and final law, that of Receptivity and how challenging it can be for so many.

In one sense, the abundance of lack messages permeating our daily lives can create a focus on what is missing rather than on all the natural prosperity surrounding us.

Then, there are worthiness issues that rear their ugly heads from time-to-time. “Am I deserving enough to receive?”

Adding to the above receptivity challenges is that they both typically work on an unconscious level where the person is not even aware that the issues exist!

There’s another aspect to receptivity though that can also stand in the way. While it’s on more of a conscious level, it also means we knowingly have to face some possible fears.

Receptivity can be a fragile thing, because to be receptive, you must leave yourself open. Keeping yourself genuinely open to a yes also means you expose yourself to a possible no.

Having the courage to embrace an unexpected path also means embracing the risk that this path may lead nowhere — or nowhere good.

Perhaps this is the most challenging thing about being receptive: it means allowing yourself to be vulnerable.

The key is to embrace that vulnerability and, rather than letting potentially uncomfortable experiences diminish your joy and sense of fulfillment, let them deepen your ability to receive the abundance you desire…and that you deserve.

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The Go-Giver: A Little Story About a Powerful Business Idea by Bob Burg and John David Mann is now available in an expanded edition. It includes a Discussion Guide, Author Q & A and a Foreword by Arianna Huffington. You can receive Chapter One by visiting www.thegogiver.com/tggee

Adversaries Into Allies, Bob Burg, Communication, family, Relationship, Story

When “On It” Does Not Mean “Under You.”

I called Mom who answered her phone sounding hurried. She said she was looking for her phone but couldn’t find it. I said, “Mom you are on it.” She said hold on I will look. I could hear shuffling, then she said, “No, I am not on it.”

Screen Shot 2014-06-08 at 10.22.05 AM I looked at my cell phone to see what number I had dialed, then asked what phone she was looking for. She said “My cell.” That is the phone I was talking to her on. I giggled and insisted that she was “on it.” She sounded irritated with me, but called to my stepdad saying, “Ray, Amy insist that I am on it, will you come look under me?”

I now had a full blown belly laugh going. She was so irritated with me as she said she was “in a hurry and had to hang up so she could find her phone.” Knowing dang well that she was looking under her body, each time I told her she was on it, I said it one more time.

“Mom you are ON IT.” LOL “Amy I AM NOT, we looked.”

I know that hitting the target is not the targets responsibility. In Bob Burg’s book, Adversaries Into Allies, he says, “One surefire way of successfully taking responsibility for hitting the communication target is to avoid giving-or accepting-mixed messages.”

To be more clear in my communication, I asked her what hand she was holding her phone with. She answered “My left. Amy, I am in a hurry.” I said, “Okay okay, look at your left hand, and you will find your phone.” I heard her voice fade as she pulled the phone from her face saying, “Oh look Ray, Amy found my phone.”

Sometimes saying the same thing, the same way, over and over are again, is not effective communication. If I miss my target, I am the one who must adjust.

Attitude, Belief Systems, Choices, Communication, Communication Skills, Empathy, Heart Touching, Relationship, Story, Value

Giant Jesus Popsicle- My Learning Model For Success

 

Giant Jesus Popsicle.
Giant Jesus Popsicle.


I got the most people to go to church; therefore, I won the trash-can-sized, giant, Jesus popsicle, that had a 2×4 as the stick. Little did I know that the memory of this event would become my learning model for success.

When I was seven years old, a church bus picked up anybody who wanted to go to church. My brothers, sister, some friends, and I would go each Sunday. I especially loved learning that God lives in the mansion of my heart.Before going to sleep each evening, I sat on the side of the bed, reaching up to tap my heart to let Jesus know to “hang on, because I am laying down now.” I didn’t want Him to fall over when the mansion went on its side as I slept. Each morning I patted my heart to tell Him to “Wake up now; I am getting out of bed.”

The day the Sunday school teacher announced the giant popsicle contest to see who can get the most people to go to church, I began testifying of the love of God. I went door to door that afternoon and told parents and their children that Jesus lives in a mansion in my heart, and He will live in theirs, too. I shared how I was never alone and how He was watchful over me. I told them how “He guides me and protects my every move.” (Tweet)

I shared that all they had to do was meet me at my house, 336 West Cheryl Place, next Sunday morning and the bus would take all of us where they, too, could get Jesus in their hearts. That next Saturday, I again went door to door to remind them that the bus would be there in the morning. Sunday morning came, and there was a long line of twenty-three children in front of my house waiting to get on that bus to go to church.Screen Shot 2014-05-07 at 11.16.03 PM

I was so excited to know that this many children would get Jesus in their hearts that day. (Tweet) I stood by the bus door and cheerfully welcomed each one of them as they boarded. They were excited, too, in fact one little girl, Smelly Cathy they called her, thanked me for letting her know about this. I think it was more my pleasure than hers, because I knew what they were all about to receive.

At church it was announced that I had won the giant popsicle. (Tweet) My new friends and I jumped up and down and cheered. Funny thing is, I had forgotten about the popsicle, because I was so focused on what the children would get. The bus dropped us off in front of my house with the trash-can-sized, popsicle. One of the church employees was trying to pull the giant popsicle out of the trash can, until the bus driver laughingly told them to leave it in the trash can. It took three men to off-load it into my yard. LOL It was huge!

I told the children to wait as I ran in the house to get spoons with which all of us could dig into the popsicle. I ran inside and shouted, “Mom, look outside at how many children have Jesus in their heart mansions,” as I grabbed spoons. She followed me out and said, “Oh, honey, you won! ” I say, they won, because they met their Abba Father that day.

Do you see my learning model for success? First of all, I see that God is my business partner. Next I see that I knew and focused on the value the people would get. Next, I was detached from the outcome of winning that popsicle. Due to being detached from the outcome,  I know I am a winner even without that popsicle, AND the popsicle is great!

Being a Go Giver, (see Bob Burgs book here)  is just who I am, not just what I do.  (TWEETABLE)

Can you think back to an early childhood success, then find your learning model for success?

PS. This post was inspired by an exercise I was asked to do, by Paul Martinelli and Roddy Galbraith  in a group mastermind study of Think And Grow Rich. Thank you my mentors, I love y’all.

Belief Systems, Communication

Belief Systems and Effective Communication

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AdversariesintoAllies-stackedToday’s post is written by my mentor and dear friend, Bob Burg. Bob’s newest book, Adversaries Into Allies was released today, October 31, 2013. Drawing on his own experiences and the stories of other influential people, in this book, Burg offers five simple principles of what he calls Ultimate Influence™ — the ability to move people to your side in a way that leaves everyone feeling great about the outcome… and about themselves!


Belief Systems and Effective Communication
by Bob Burg

Why is it so often the case that, what we’re absolutely sure we know…turns out to be wrong? Tweet This Because, we make decisions based on very limited information; information controlled by our personal Belief System.

Our Belief System is a combination of upbringing, environment, schooling, news media, television, movies; really, every experience our mind ever takes in.

It operates unconsciously and drives our thoughts and behaviors without our even being aware of such.

It is also the root cause for practically all miscommunication.

How do we overcome this and communicate much more effectively?

First, we need to become aware that, while we are acting unconsciously out of our own Belief System, the other person is, too. Yes, two very different sets of beliefs are in play!

Next, we practice staying aware; constantly checking that we are making decisions based not on appearances but on what really is.

Here’s an effective way to work within this context in order to practically ensure that both you and the other person come out winners.

When in conflict, ask yourself four questions:

1. How is my personal Belief System distorting the actual truth of the situation?

2. How is his or her personal Belief System distorting the actual truth of the situation?

3. What questions can I ask this person that will clarify my understanding of their version of the truth (their Belief System)?

4. What information can I give that will help them clarify their understanding of my version of the truth (my Belief System)?

As the saying goes, within conflict between two or more people, there are generally three truths: your truth, their truth, and the actual truth (really, those first two truths are actually beliefs).

Through questions, as well as a caring exchange of information, the real truth can usually be discovered, generating understanding, respect and peace. This leads to results in alignment with our Belief Systems in which both people win, feel great about the situation, and about each other.

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Excerpted from Bob Burg’s new book, Adversaries into Allies. Best known as coauthor of The Go-Giver, Burg’s newest book will help you to become a top influencer and persuader, learning how to consistently obtain the results you want, while helping everyone come away a winner. You can get Chapter One by visiting www.AdversariesintoAllies.com.